Many
couples choose to incorporate at least one or two of their family's
culture's customs or traditions into their wedding
plans. Wedding customs and traditions
are usually as important to the couple's families as they are
to the couple. Having cultural customs as part of your wedding
is a personal choice and can be a delicate subject to deal with
if you have two people from different backgrounds joining in marriage.
Some couples decide to have two separate wedding
ceremonies. Each wedding ceremony
represents a different culture and its customs. One wedding
ceremony will embracing the Bride's
family's customs and the other, usually on a different day but
not always, will celebrate the Groom's family's
traditions. Handling the wedding this way is
a lot more work and of course it will bring additional expenses
to your wedding's budget. This
is a way of respecting both of your cultures if celebrating your
family's customs is really important to you. You will probably
need your families help and support in the wedding
plans. Other couples try to incorporate a few
customs from each of their backgrounds into their wedding.
If you are flexible, this will save you money, time and even some
stress. Either way, the important thing is that you are embracing
each others cultures and traditions on a day that should reflect
on where you have come from and where your lives are headed. Your
wedding is the celebration of two unique lives
coming together in a celebration of love. Below find some of the
customs found in different cultural backgrounds.
African-American
An African-American custom is "jumping of the broom"
that symbolize the beginning of a new life for the newly married
couple. The ritual was created during the time of slavery, when
African-Americans where not able to legally marry. This wedding
tradition can be traced to the African tribal marriage
ritual of placing sticks on the ground that represented the couple's
new home. The jumping of the broom symbolizes sweeping away the
old, and welcoming the new. Broom jumping is performed either
at the wedding ceremony after
the minister pronounces the couple husband and
wife or at the wedding reception
as the Bridal Party arrives
to the reception. Fully decorated broom can be
purchased at ethnic stores or some couples may prefer to use a
regular broom beautifully decorated with flowers, ribbons and
other items in their wedding colours.
Belgian
The Bride hands her mother a flower from her
bridal bouquet as she walks down the aisle to
the front and her mother can give her a hug. When the wedding
ceremony is over the and the new couple walk
back up the aisle they stop and the Bride gives
the Groom's mother a flower from her bridal
bouquet and they too may embrace.
Chinese
The Bride usually wears a red wedding
dress to symbolize love and joy. At the wedding
reception a nine-course meal is usually served.
There are typically speeches given at the wedding reception.
French
At the wedding reception the wedding
couple raises two glasses of wine from two different vineyards.
Then they pour the two glasses of wine into a third glass and
each drink from it signifying the union of the two families through
marriage. The traditional "Hope Chest"
originated from France.
German
At the wedding ceremony the Groom
kneels on the hem of the Bride's gown symbolizing
his control over her. In return the Bride may
step on the Groom's foot when she rises to symbolize
her power over him.
Greek
During the wedding ceremony the wedding
couple may wear a crown of flowers. Then the couple walks around
the alter three times to represent the Holy Trinity. At the wedding
reception guests often line up single file and perform Greek folk
dances.
Hispanic
During the wedding ceremony thirteen gold coins
representing the Groom's dowry to his Bride
are blessed by the priest and transferred between the hands of
the wedding couple several times ending in the
Bride's hands. A large rosary or white rope called
a lasso is placed around the couple's shoulders in the shape of
a figure-8 or infinity symbol signifying the union as one.
Irish
Bridal showers have replaced a tradition form
the early 1900's. As the wedding couple walked
to the church for their wedding people would
through household items at them. Now people throw showers and
shower them with gifts.
Some Irish people wear a "claddagh" ring for a wedding
ring. This ring was created by a master goldsmith, Richard Joyce,
400 years ago in a fishing village called Claddagh, which overlooks
Galway Bay. The claddagh symbolizes love, loyalty, and friendship.
On the right hand, with the heart facing inward, it means the
wearer's heart is unoccupied. Facing outwards reveals love is
being considered. When worn on the left hand facing outward, it
signifies that the wearer is seriously committed or married.
At some Irish wedding receptions,
the Groom is lifted in a chair ("jaunting
car") to celebrate that he is a married
man. For good luck, the newlyweds are given a horseshoe to display
in their home in the upward position. A traditional Irish wedding
cake is a fruitcake. Traditional Irish toasts,
in addition to remarks from the Best Man, are very popular.
Irish Marriage Blessing
May God be with you and bless you;
May you see your children's children.
May you be poor in misfortune,
Rich in blessings,
May you know nothing but happiness.
From this day forward.
Italian
Some Brides may choose to carry a white silk
or satin purse ("busta") to store gifts of money that
are welcomed. "Tarantella" folk dances are popular at
the wedding reception. Another
Italian custom is to present five sugar-coated almonds to the
guests which represent health, wealth, long life, fertility, and
happiness.
Japanese
The Bride and her Parents might visit the Groom's
house on wedding day. At the wedding
ceremony, the Bride's wedding
gown is often a traditional wedding kimono. She
usually changes into something else at the wedding
reception. The first of nine sips of sake drunk
by the Bride and Groom at their
wedding ceremony symbolizes
the official union of marriage.
Jewish
It is Jewish tradition for a Bride to present
her Groom with a tallit to wear for his Aufruf,
the reading of the Torah prior to their wedding
ceremony. Often the Groom's
family will give the Bride candlesticks to be
used during the wedding ceremony. It is custom
that Jewish men cover their heads at all times with a kippot (yarmulkes)
especially during prayers. This is a form of reverence, respect,
and acknowledgement that God is present everywhere. In some congregations
the women also cover their heads to pray.In some congregations
the women also cover their heads to pray.
Some
Orthodox, Conservative, and Reform wedding ceremonies
take place under a chuppah (wedding canopy). The chuppah is a
rectangular piece of cloth large enough for the Bride,
Groom, Rabbi, and sometimes other members of
the wedding party to stand under. The chuppah
signifies the new home about to be shared by the newlyweds.
Before the procession to the chuppah, the tanaim are signed, and
the Groom is asked if he is ready to take on
the responsibilities outlined in the kepubah. He signifies his
willingness by accepting a handkerchief or other object offered
to him by the Rabbi. The two witnesses to this sign the ketubah.
While the actual text of the ketubah is never meant to vary, the
border decorations on this document have over the centuries been
the subject of remarkable artistic creations. At the beginning
of the wedding ceremony, the
Bride might observe the Biblical custom of "Circling
the Groom" seven times. This practice is
seen as a powerful act of definition, where the Bride
will symbolically create the space that they will share as husband
and wife. In Judaism, the number seven is mystical and represents
completion and fulfillment. Just as the creation of the world
was finished in seven days, the seven circles complete the couple's
search for each other.
The
bedeken, or veiling, is a small wedding ceremony
in which the Groom lowers the veil over the Bride's
face, and by this act acknowledges that he is marrying
the correct woman. This custom originated in the story of Jacob
who didn't see the face of his Bride prior to
his wedding and was tricked into marrying Leah
instead of his intended, Rachel.
The
Jewish marriage ceremony consists of two parts:
Erusin (pre-engagement) and Nissuin (marriage).
These wedding ceremonies were historically performed
up to one year apart, but more recently the two have been combined
into one ceremony. The Eursin ceremony begins with Kiddush, the
blessing over the wine. Kiddush is part of virtually all Jewish
observances as a prayer of sanctification. The exchange of rings
completes the Erusin ceremony.
In
Jewish law, an act of Kinyan must happen to declaration of marriage
legal. It is a formal physical acquisition. It is reached when
two people witness the Bride accept a ring from her Groom
and the Groom recites the words of marriage.
Often after the ketubah has been read at the wedding ceremony,
wine is often poured into a new glass, and the Sheva Berakhot
(Seven Benedictions) are recited over it. The Bride
and Groom then drink from the glass of wine.
With the wedding ceremony complete, tradition
calls for the Groom to break the wrapped glass
by stomping on it. This final action symbolizes the destruction
of the Holy Temple in Israel, and reminds guests that love is
fragile. The audience may shout Mazel Tov, and the Bride
and Groom kiss.
Immediately
after the wedding ceremony, the couple may spend
a few private moments together, or Yichud as a symbolic consummation
of their marriage. Later, the Mitzvah, or obligation,
of rejoicing at a wedding reception
is incumbent on the Bride, Groom,
and wedding guests.
Mexican
Red beads are often thrown at the newlyweds for
good luck in the future. Godparents known as Padrinos support
the engaged couple throughout their engagement and support them
financially for their wedding.
Polish
The Bride's mother will sometimes place the veil
on the Bride before the wedding
ceremony symbolizing her last Motherly task for
her daughter before she is married. Sometimes
a traditional folk song "Twelve Angels is played at the wedding
reception where the Bride transfers
her veil and good luck to be married to her Maid
of Honor, Bridesmaids, and Flower Girl. Often the wedding
ceremony is in the morning, then after a quick
lunch the wedding guests go home and rest before
the wedding reception in the
evening. Usually a Polka dancing and other audience participation
events occur at the wedding reception.
Scottish
The Groom and his Groomsmen often wear Scottish
kilts. The wedding day the Groom may present
the Bride with a silver teaspoon that is engraved
symbolizing that they will never go hungry. At the wedding
reception sometimes a traditional sword dance performed.
Spanish
A Spanish Groom sometimes gives his Bride thirteen
coins in memory of Christ and his twelve apostles. During the
wedding ceremony the Bride carries
them in a small bag as a symbol that the Groom
promises to provide and care for her.
Switzerland
The Bride to be wears a crown or wreath on her
head to symbolize she is engaged. The crown/wreath is destroyed
after they are married.
Welsh
It is customary that the Bride is kidnapped before
the wedding. The Groom is to
then find and rescue her.
Other
Traditions
Something Old, Something New, Something
Borrowed, Something Blue, a silver sixpence in your shoe.
What exactly does this age old tradition represent?
Something Old represents the bride's link to her old life and
to her family. Many Brides would wear their mother's
dress or a piece of handed down family jeweler on their wedding
day.
Something
New represents the Bride's new life with her
Groom, a hope for her future. Usually Brides
would use an article of her wedding attire for
this.
Something
Borrowed is supposed to be something the Bride
borrows from someone (usually a friend) that is happily married.
The happiness is said to rub off the item and bring the Bride
happiness. Usually items like jewellery are used.
Something
Blue signifies fidelity, purity and love. This is why so many
garters are trimmed with blue ribbon. Another unique alternative
to having something blue is to have the inside of your wedding
gown monogrammed with your wedding name at the bottom, near the
hem. Then if the gown is passed down through the generations,
the other Brides' names can be added. Of course this would only
be practical if the gowns style and fabrics allows it to be done
properly and so it doesn't show from the outside. We suggest that
you always use professionals when doing anything to alter your
wedding gown.
A
silver sixpence in your shoe signifies wealth in both finances
and happiness.
