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Where To Start The Wedding Planning?

Getting married is a special and wonderful time in your life. Planning your wedding is a very personal and exciting event. It may seem a little overwhelming, but it is manageable with the proper planning and organization. You can plan to do all the planning and work for yourselves or you many want to hire a wedding coordinator to help you plan some or all of your wedding. No matter how you plan your wedding you will need to make decisions about what kind of wedding you want. Wedding styles have a very broad spectrum these days. You will need to establish many factors about your wedding including the formality, any themes and colours, the season during which you want to be married, traditional vs. modern wedding, religious vs. nondenominational ceremony, the number of guests you would like to invite, the location and most importantly, the wedding budget. There must be a balance between planning the wedding of your dreams and keeping within your wedding budget. Finding this balance early in the planning stages will help you start your wedding plans on a more solid foundation; hence experiencing less disappointment and changes to your wedding plans later on. Start by prioritizing the different features and items involved with your wedding. Rate them from highest to lowest. This will give you an idea on where you may want to spend your budget money and make these things a priority in the wedding plans. It may help to make a list of the major expenses involved with planning a wedding and rate these. You can use our wedding vendors' expense list to assist you in getting started. You can also use the questions below to help you get a better picture of the wedding you want as a couple.

Your Wedding Budget
Discuss with your families if they will be contributing to your wedding financially in anyway. If you know up front that you will have help with some of the costs you can plan your wedding accordingly. Have a list of everything that will be involved with the cost of your wedding including any extras that pop up. Make sure it is clear to everyone who is responsible for the payment of each item. Figure out how much people will be contributing and the total amount of funds you have available to you for the wedding budget. You may wish to do a bit of preliminary calling around in the area of your wedding to get an idea of the average cost for wedding products and services. You can also use our Wedding Vendor Expense List to get an idea of the cost of the different aspects of a wedding planning cost. Keep in mind that these prices are only an estimated range of costs to give you an idea of what you may be spending. Some aspects have a broad range of cost depending on your wedding location, wedding formality, the number of wedding guests invited, the quality of the products being used, and who you hire for these services. You may find wedding vendors who charge more or less than our list depending on theses factors. The bottom line is, always comparison shop for value in products and services and always get at least three quotes before booking a vendor or signing a contract. You may wish to make use of our Wedding Vendor Tracking Form to keep all your vendor information organized. Keep all the sheets together with any samples and/or other planning information for easy access. You can also use our Wedding Budget Worksheet to help coordinate your budget and to help you stay on track. Be sure to keep all your receipts for purchases. This will help keep you on track with your budget and you will need your receipts if you need to return items.

A lower budget wedding that is fairly informal with a short guests list can costs about $8,000. The cost can rise to over $50,000 for a more extravagant wedding. The average expense for a wedding is between $15,000 and $20,000. Don't forget to include the honeymoon expenses into the budget so you won't be scrambling for money or worse not be able to go on the honeymoon you really want.

Good communication is vital when making your budgeting decisions. Make sure how the expenses will be divided between everyone is clearly outlined. Keep in mind, the more people contribute financially to your wedding, the more likely they'll feel they have a say in how things are planned. It's important that you don't get carried away and go way over your wedding budget and end up in debt. No one needs to start their new life together with a large debt over their head from their wedding day.

Note about Finances and Family
Sometimes it can be a little tense when merging the opinions of two families on how the wedding should be planned, especially in regards to how money will be spent. People can have very strong opinions on the subject of money. When many people are involved in the plans they all want to be heard. If you are relying on your family for their financial support, you will need to listen to their wishes with an open mind. It is usually best if you can manage to keep the conversations light and even use a little humour to keep the conversation on the positive side. It is not necessary to make all the planning decisions at your first meeting. You may need to leave some aspects of the wedding plans undecided and let people think things over for awhile. You can always meet together again at a future date to discuss these items again. Sometimes people need to think things over without the pressure of making a decision on the spot to accept an idea. You will not likely be able to make everyone completely happy on every aspect of the plans. Everyone will have to give and take somewhat, but ultimately you will have your special wedding day. Remember, you don't have to spend a lot of money to make your wedding day memorable.

The two biggest things that will increase your expenses for your wedding are the level of formality or style of your wedding and the length of your wedding guests list. One of the first things you need to do after deciding on a budget is make a rough draft of your guests list. Make a list of those people you must invite to the wedding and then another list of those people that you would like to invite if possible. Getting an idea of the number of guests will give you a better idea of the cost and size of your wedding. You may have to decide which is more important to you, having the style/formality of wedding you really want versus having more people invited to your wedding. Then make a final decision of a realistic amount of people you can invite to your wedding and the style of wedding you are going to plan. Use our Wedding Guests Tracking Form to organize your wedding guests list and to track your guests' replies. Just print off as many sheets as you need to accommodate your wedding. You will need to know approximately how many guests you are inviting to book the appropriate size facility for your wedding ceremony and reception.

Sometimes the transition between everything you really want for your wedding and what you can really afford is a little disappointing. So plan your finances well and choose wisely when spending your budget money. Try to keep each item within the allotted amount. If you do spend more on an item, try to spend less on another item to make up the difference. Comparison shopping can really help you safe money. Think about the overall appearance of things. If you think something will look thrown together or cheap, find an alternative or skip it all together. Below are a few things that can help you deal with and stick to a strict budget.

Planning the Fun Wedding Stuff
Weddings today can be and are quite often an expression of the couple's character. Couples can get quite creative with their special day. Sometimes, the whole day has an extraordinary theme or you many want to incorporate only a portion of your wedding day. The ideas for theme and unique wedding plans are endless. Themes can be as subtle as a candlelight wedding ceremony or more obvious like a medieval village with everyone dressed in costume. There are countless wedding theme ideas including country, pioneer, a mystery train ride, tropical beach, a holiday wedding like Christmas, Easter, or a Halloween masquerade party. You can even have the theme represent a certain time in history like the roaring 20s or a favourite place in the world. Integrating the invitations, attire, decorations, favours for the wedding guests, flowers, and even the cake can add to the overall feel of your wedding theme.

Thoughts When Choosing Your Wedding Date
When choosing your wedding date, you may wish to contact the municipal office of the city or town in which you are planning to have your wedding. Make sure there are no events going on at the same time as your wedding. Many cities and towns have festivals during the summer months. Not only will the traffic be busier, roads may be closed at certain times and it may be harder to find accommodations for your out of town wedding guests. Also, keep mindful of the seasonal weather conditions. If you hate the thought of sweating and needing to freshen up throughout your wedding day, you may want to choose a wedding date away from the hot summer months. If you have a lot of guests traveling long distances on roads, you may not want to plan a winter wedding. For spring weddings, it's a good idea to invest in some umbrellas for your wedding party just incase it rains on your wedding day.

Destination Weddings
Some couples decide to have their wedding performed while on vacation. Examples include on a tropical beach, on a romantic cruise ship, in a historical castle or even in the glitter of Las Vegas. They usually take another couple or a few special people in their lives with them as witnesses. After the wedding the couple can stay for their honeymoon or go to another destination. A great idea for vacation weddings is web casting. Web casting your wedding allows people at home to watch your wedding ceremony online. You may also be surprised to know that some photographers will travel with you to your destination to film your wedding. Some vacation resorts specialize in weddings. You may wish to use them for their experience but bear in mind there will probably be a few weddings going on at the same time as yours at this type of location.

Some couples decide to have a wedding reception to celebrate their marriage with all their family and friends when they return from their destination wedding. If you decide to do this, an idea is to decorate your wedding reception in the theme of your destination wedding. You can use seashells or other items known for that particular destination. Again integrating all the aspects of the reception, invitations, cake, decorations, flowers, and attire will only add to the destination ambiance of your wedding reception. Note if you do plan a reception after your return, you will probably spend the same amount, or more on your wedding.

Wedding Web Cams
Web cam weddings are becoming more popular and will continue to be even more common in the years to come. The web cam makes it possible for couples to share their wedding day with friends and family around the world over the internet, even if the wedding is taking place in the most remote of places. This is a great option if family or friends aren't able to travel to the wedding due to a variety of reasons including illness. Web cams are also being used to help brides and grooms plan their weddings. Some bridal stores have web cam available so brides can get the opinion of someone special about different wedding gowns they try on live over the internet. There are many companies that offer this service, but it's also becoming more readily available thanks to modern technology. The best source for more information on web cam weddings is of course, the internet, or talk to someone that is highly skilled in computers.

Off-season Weddings
Planning a wedding in the off-season can bring with it great savings and benefits, but also some complications. The off-season for weddings is usually between November and April here in Ontario, but most certainly the months of November, January, February and March. It is the time when the weather is not as nice and can also be unpredictable.

Advantages of an Off-season Wedding
Some wedding professionals will give a discount in the less busy season when there is not as much of a demand for their services. Couples are more likely to be able to book the professionals of their choice because there are more openings available. However this usually doesn't apply during the holiday season when professionals are busy with holiday parties. Also, most people book their vacation time in the summer and can be away for a summer wedding. Another advantage is that many things keep better or remain fresher when they are not exposed to the hot summer elements. Flowers, food, chocolate, even your wedding cake will be better preserved. You will not have to worry about things melting, wilting or spoiling in the summer heat.

Disadvantages of an Off-Season Wedding
Here in Ontario, we can get some extreme winter weather which can make it hard to drive. This can be a real issue especially if you have a lot of out of town wedding guests coming to your wedding. December is usually a very busy month for people with holiday preparations and gatherings. Having a wedding in December can be really hectic and stressful for everyone involved. It can also be harder to get great wedding photos in the winter. The outdoors can be very messy and everyone will need coats and boots to be comfortable. The mess of slush can also be a problem. The tracking of snow inside and keeping formal clothing clean can be a real challenge. A long train is hard enough to keep clean in dry weather let alone in slushy snow. For most of these reasons many couples choose to have their wedding between the months of May and October.

A Note on Second Weddings
Second weddings used to be expected to be kept low key. These days, every wedding is a time to celebrate the love between two people no matter how many times they have been married before. Second weddings are usually a chance to enjoy the celebrations and to have it really reflect your personalities. Second weddings are sometimes more than the joining of two lives, often it's the joining of two families. This is a true reason to celebrate.

If you are getting married for the second time and the first marriage ended in divorce you will need the original or a court certified copy of your certificate of divorce when applying for your marriage licence in Ontario. See this government link for more information about Marriage after Divorce.

The Family Wedding Ceremony or Family Medallion Ceremony
Many second marriages today involve the integration of families. Some couples who already have children decide to include the children in the wedding ceremony. They actually have a part of the wedding ceremony dedicated to the uniting of the family. This is an amazing way to help children feel accepted and a part of this new and important change in life. If you wish to do something like this, talk to your wedding officiant. You can even write vows for each of the family members and light a candle together. Another related ceremony is the family medallion ceremony that also expresses the importance of family in a marriage. During the wedding ceremony, after the ring exchange, the Bride and Groom give each of their children a medal medallion symbolizing their love and the uniting of the family as a whole. The medallions are usually made of sterling silver or gold and come in the form of pendants, rings, lapel pins, or charm bracelets. The design on the medallion is three linked circles representing the uniting of the family with the top two linked circles representing the Bride and Groom and these two circles both linking through the bottom link representing the child. What a wonderful keepsake for children to help them remember your wedding day.

Some Words of Advice
Putting your wedding together involves many tasks, plenty of people, and their opinions. You will be bombarded with people giving you advice and telling you how things should be done to have the perfect wedding. Handle this with patience. Stay calm, thank them for their input and tell them you will think about what they have suggested. Sometimes you will get ideas that you think will work wonderfully for you and your wedding. Sometimes things will sound down right insane to you. Take what you want from the advice and pick your battles wisely. Most people are just trying to help you out but ultimately it is your wedding and your decision.

You will have worked hard to put your wedding day together a day you want to remember vividly for the rest of your life. Every hour or so stop with your partner and look around. Take a moment to reflect on what is going on around you. Feel your love for one another and the love of your friends and family sharing the experience with you. This will ensure that your day doesn't slip away in a whirlwind of activity. Have fun, stay relaxed and enjoy every moment of the celebration of your new life together.

If something goes wrong during your wedding day, and usually something does, don't let it upset everything. You can really ruin your special day by stressing. In most cases, your guests won’t even know that things didn't go off as planned. Don't let anxiety spoil one of the most important days of your life. Your wedding day is about two people bringing their lives together in a celebration of love. Focus on the true purpose of why you are having this day and not on the things that didn't go on as planned.

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